peece of mind.... and heart...

....u know i know a lot of you read that bulliten i wrote... about how sad I was ...about wut i saw...

nd many of u replied... and for that i am very thankful... a lot of you messaged me bak with sooooo many comforting words and i really appreciate it..

thank you to that one person for that verse...Matthew 6:33.... read it.. its a good one...

nd thank you to that one person who reminded me that the struggles we face will only make you stronger and that the Lord has something much better in store for me...

nd thank you to those that just talked with me..

u know... i am fine... please dont get me wrong... its just those times wen i see those things... i get all emo..

I forgave that person already... nd u know I am sooo greatful that i met that person... because he showed me a love that most people dont get a chance to experience at our age... I learned to love unconditionally... and for that I am greatful... even though i left that relationship with a seriously broken heart... im soo glad it happend..

i mean people ask me how i do it... how i can still keep a smile on my face after EVERYTHING i've been through and am still going through... well its simple... God.... i know that God has great things instore for me... lol but sumtimes wen im emo i need people to remind me of that...

its soooo hard for sum people to forgive... but for me its eeasy... this person put me through hell... and yet... im ok with it... i forgave him because on some WEIRD level i understand him and am happy for him

i pray for him all the time... everyday... because thats wut u do wen u love someone... you pray for them ... even if they dont want u around...

u know how in movies... nd there would be a girl and two guys.... nd she ends up going with one of the guys nd the other guy ses "as long as ur happy im happy" in my head id be like OOOKKK ya right he didnt get the girl.... how can he be happy that shes with another guy??...

but now i understand... i am happy hes happy...im glad that he found someone to love... i just always pray that she will take care of him and love him how i did...

one day... God will bring me that guy that i am supposed to spend the rest of my life with.... that strong faithful guy that wil treat me how a guy should treat me...and to that guy... i'll be here waiting till that precious day wen God allows us to finally meet each other...

u know some people ... if they experienced wut i experienced... they would be afraid to persue another relationship... but I'm not.. because sometimes  you have to take risks in life... sometimes u have to risk the possibility of getting hurt...

wen u learn to ride a bike ...and u fall u dont just give up because of that one time u got hurt... u try and try again until u are successful... its a learning experience... u learn wut not to do until u get it right

nd ya i did get bak in the dating world... only to get hurt again... nd im ok with it AGAIN hahaha... iono i guess im just able to accept things better then other people...

with God at my side... i feel like i can take ANYTHING the world throws at me...

i've  been through more then most people my age... and even older... and for that I am greatful...because all that only makes me stronger then the norm.

my name valerie means strong... nd it is true... i am strong... on the inside..( im am priti buff too haha jk)

true love

leilani (my daughter) is so wonderful..

my daughter is my pride and joy.... she gives me my motivation to succeed in life

wen i look at her theres this happiness i cant explain..

my mornings are the best... i wake up to the most beautiful sound anyone can ever hear.... her beautiful voice saying "Mommy mommmy" ... i open my eyes and see this lil angelic face hovering over mine.... nd then she ses .."HIIIIII MOMMY!!" and i cant help but smile and get up no matter how tired i am...

or sumtimes i'll wake up and look her direction and see that shes just waiting in bed for me to wake up... nd she allows me to sleep a little more...then wen she notices that im awake she gets up real quick and hops on me nd ses "MOMMMYYYY!!" like im the best person in the world HAHAHA

then there are times i just watch her play on her own...i just sit and watch her dance around... nd scream and "sing" hahaha nd i watch her try to get into things shes not supposed to... nd i think in my head... wow i have a great kid...

then there are times wen she'll be playing and she'll stop ..look at me...make the biggest smile ever... and RUNNNNN her little heart out into my arms and she gives me the biggest hug and kiss...

wen i hold her... and she rests her little head on my shoulder is the best.... usualy i'll pat her bakk and rock her... and while i do that she'll take her little hand and pats me on the back too HAHAHA

then there are times...she is soo much like her dad...and it makes me sad again... but then she makes me laugh... like how he used to...

she ALWAYS tried to be funny..

she has the most beautiful voice you have ever heard...its so sweet and tiny yet LOUDDDDD ... wen she talks to me... its so soft and genuine...

just thinking of her makes me cry... a happy cry... cuz thats my little girl...

i love the way she ses "WEEESSSSSTSIIIIDDDE" nd "Sup MA" and smiles big wen she farts and ses so pround..."MOMMY....I FAH TED" hahahahaha i also looove how wen the song LIKE A CHOLO she leans like a cholo...( i didnt teach her thaat i guess its jusr in her jeans .....omg shes so wonderful... she is my joy... Gods gift to me... Gods wonderful blessing i didnt deserve.. she is my light... she is my everything...

no matter how tired i am...no matter how horrible the day went.... her voice...face..laughter..nd the shine in her eyes... can always make me smile..

when she kisses me... at random times... it is so wonderfull... i feel peace in my heart that yes... everything is ok... God is too good to me... too good....

hahaha right now shes dancing... shes too cute... i love her... i love God...

aite then i wish u all a very happy day today.. love you al MUAH

p.s.  sometimes i wish he would dedicate that song Sorry blame me... by Akon...welll..... the begining part hahahah not the end...