SO funny how i always want wut i cant have....

lol well jah im freakin stupid...ok yea i know buh yea i always want things i cant have..nd den wen i have it... i dont rilli want it lol buh yea i should frikin quit dat crap cuz das nawt good...ok well yea last nite i had da nmost freakiest dream ever...i wuz like on dis frikin comp sendind pixes to dis gguy...den my comp shuts off den i try to turn on da lights buh dey wont turn on...so i figure dat da power is out..so i try to get to my mom who wuz upstairz buh i could barely walk or see. ...nadn so i called my mom for help..she answerd once but didnt come...nd so i called for her again nd she didnt answer....so i wuz desperate for help so i called for my dad...he didnt answer....den suin pulled me bak into da living room nd den i couldnt stand...suin wuz pullin me under da bed...its wuz da devil...buh in my mind i wuz praying..i wuz yellin in my mind to God for help...i asked god not to leave me nd told him dat i love him...den i yelled at da devill... i said ur nawt gonna wim ur nawt gonna win...i hate chu ur nawt gonna get me....i wuz trying to wake up cuz i knew i wuz asleep so i tried my best to wake myself up..i finally did nd i wuz scared....yea Katzy said dat it wuz bcuz dare wuz prolly a spiritual battle goin on in me while i wuz asleep....which is true...because...i have to admit..im nawt as strong with god as i wuz b4.....i mean i guess i totally jus stopped tryin to ignore him all i could...buh yea im tryin my best to go bak to how i wuz b4 buh i need help...i mean it aint koo u knoe knowin dat ur slippin away frum God...nd iono where to go for help...buh yea i hope i'll b aite ....pray for me yea...... lol MAN ok yea im tryin to find a church dat i will help me grow.....love u all..pssshhh why does all dis kinda stuff happen to me?.....